Morbius: The living vampire in a dead movie. Finally! Morbius arrived in theatres on the 1st of April, and I was quite excited to watch a good vampire movie with the violence, gore, and horror that normally follow with these kinds of movies. Morbius is about a kid suffering from a blood disorder that leaves him weak and prone to death at any second, he’s sent to a specialist hospital for proper care and he meets milo, who is in the same situation. Morbius grows to become a doctor bent on finding a cure and it turns out the apparent cure has its baggage and he turns into a vampire in the end. Milo asks for the “cure” and gets turned down and then he steals it anyway and there’s a big fight, the end. If you still don’t get it, this is a terrible movie. Anyway, let’s get this over with so we can move on with our lives. First and foremost, there is absolutely nothing positive about this movie. It’s no surprise the studio placed an embargo on reviews until a few hours before it was released worldwide, it doesn’t help that this movie is PG 13 which means there’s no blood which makes no sense because how can you make a vampire movie without blood? The plot progression is very poor and many scenes are left unresolved, the promising aspects of the movie are unexplored. A huge example would be the inner struggle of good and evil, to drink blood or not, and how that affects him as a doctor that was an angle that could have set him apart from the generic vampire typecast. The main character makes a lot of stupid decisions not consistent with his character portrayal. Like running when he didn’t have to and exposing himself as a vampire for no good reason. The final boss fight is even dafter in comparison, especially the part where he punches the “bad guy” with a swarm of vampire bats, LOL! The CGI is another huge mess it looks like something from a video game and even then, it’s hard to make out much from the fight scene except the snapshot moments which just makes that stupid in the end. The editing crew should be arrested because it was clear that many parts were cut out post-production of this film and it felt like a movie that was meant to be 2+ hours long. In the end, we were left with a movie that threw lots of information at us and did fuck all with it. For the cast, there were only two bright spots and to be honest, I’m quite surprised they pulled anything off at all considering how bad the script was. Matt Stone is most commonly known for his role as the 11th incarnation of “ DR. who.” He was great in his role, and it was quite a shame to see such a performance wasted on an abysmal movie such as this one. It was clear he had fun playing the flamboyant and blood-thirsty vampire and was a stark contrast to the bored, boring vegan vampire played by Jared Leto. Al Madrigal played Agent Rodrigues and he was quite funny, landing quite a few jokes here and there, keeping it a bit interesting in his scenes, on the other hand, Tyrese looked incredibly lost and confused playing an FBI agent, he was totally out of character and to be honest completely unfit for that role. Basically, after the huge success with Spiderman: No way home this was the best time to build momentum but it’s clear Sony still doesn’t have what it takes to build a successful superhero franchise on its own. This movie is repugnant and a complete waste of brain cells. It might have been mildly successful 15 years ago but the world has moved on and so should we all from this disgrace. Rating: 1.5/10
Movie Knights